Melanomagoodness

Man, I feel so melancholy lately. Where do you suppose that word came from? Melancholy. Does it perhaps mean melon-like? Man, I feel so melon-like lately. I'm sweet and soft, but all people ever want to do is squeeze me, sniff me and throw me back with all the other melons. That, or they take me home, cut me up and chew me with their sharp teeth. Why don't people understand that melons can do things, they can feel things. Well, not real melons. But I can.